Hey Mr. Tambourine Man

After yesterday's post, I received several emails and Facebook messages asking me to tell the 'tambourine story', so here it is...

Sometime in the early millennium, and before my mojo showed signs of extinguishing, I found myself at Mt. Hotham alpine resort for the opening of the ski season (yes, we do get snow downunder).

The locals declared the abundance of snow was a good start to the season - though some (like me) may have argued that it was too much, as there was consequently a perilous amount of black ice on the roads.

One night a small group of us went out for dinner to celebrate the Queen's birthday (as that's the official holiday weekend that marks the beginning of the season, even though it's nowhere near Her Majesty's real birthday, nor were we really celebrating it).

After a fabulous meal and a few Jägermeister digestives, I started to relax and - let's face it - got a little tipsy.

There was a live band playing, which stirred my inner rock star. Before I knew it, I had made my way from the dance floor onto the stage and was rocking, tambourine in hand, with the lead singer. Reports state that I robbed him of said instrument, but did such a good job at entertaining the audience (and band members) that I earned my place on stage.

I was shaking my booty, slapping it hard with the stolen goods. I sensed a growing feeling discomfort (from the self-imposed tambourine spanking, not from the theft or playing in front of a full house of unsuspecting groovers) so I turned the other cheek (haha).

Surprisingly, the tambourine grew heavier to the point that it felt like I was shaking an antique coal iron weighing 25kg (55 pounds). I switched from hand to hand, attempting to make it lighter by briefly resting in a cleverly disguised clap'n'shuffle motion.

At the end of the night I felt my biceps were the size of the Incredible Hulk's, and my face was probably a similar colour. I was escorted home by my husband (then boyfriend) - but sadly his usual lightening-fast reflexes were not lightening fast enough to save me from what followed...

The moment I stepped outside I was smacked in the face by the iced cold air, and thumped in the back of the head by an ice cold pavement - I'd slipped on black ice, and came crashing down with a thud. Ouch.

The next morning I woke up with a pounding headache, though couldn't distinguish whether it was from the black ice incident or the Jägermeister.

I headed for the shower and when I gripped the door handle, I winced with pain. I looked at my hands and they were blackened with bruises (whoever knew your hands could bruise...???). I inspected my body for further damage and discovered I had matching bruises on both hips and butt cheeks - I looked like I had been wrestling with a rhinoceros.

From that moment on, I had a new found respect for tambourines and those who play them... not to mention equal respect for black ice and Jägermeister.

Until tomorrow, may you rock the star within - minus the bruising.

Grace xx

ps. I Googled tambourine images and came across this fabulous comic artist Natalie Dee (see pic). Please check out her website and have a chuckle, very quirky.

The Gemini Within

Do you ever feel that you have a split personality?

There's a part of you that's safe, conservative, careful, sensible and, quite frankly, a little dull. You have brilliant ideas, but are too shit scared to do anything about it - like painting the living room wall hot pink, then you settle for sage.

You purchase classic clothing items because they either 'never go out of style' or 'go with everything' - then a few months later, you want to shoot yourself when you can't put a whimsical outfit together. You are reliable, responsible and dead set serious.

You never admit it openly, but you're also a bit of a scrooge.

You really get pissed off over splitting bills when you've only had soft drinks (even though mineral water is triple the price of the house red). You can never leave behind cute hotel shampoo and conditioner bottles, not to mention miniature jam jars (don't laugh boys, we know you can't say no to free bar snacks, despite the high probability of them being contaminated by urine).

Then there's the other part of you... the part that is totally outrageous.

You go shopping with complete abandon and make reckless purchases - like a multi thousand dollar entertainment system with universal remote control (for guess who?) or a petite, totally impractical and hideously overpriced beaded clutch (aka glorified make up bag) that you'll only ever use for weddings, and that's okay, because it looks gorgeous and you simply must have it (lads, your role here is to carry our camera, purse, keys and mobile phone).

You generally like to stay in control, but when you let your hair down - watch out - you are over the top! A loud, flamboyant, colourful and spontaneous risk-taker; you care less about what people think and try harder to make people laugh. You are generous and money is no object.

What you once found terrifying - i.e. a camera, microphone or tambourine (I have a whole story about that) is now your best friend. You become suspiciously better at flirting, playing billiards and speaking a foreign language. You may easily be enticed to cross-dress and, should you ever find yourself in Munich during Oktoberfest, stand on a table and sing 'Ein Prosit' - then piss yourself and end up on YouTube (thankfully that part was not me).

Is it normal to have two completely opposite facets to your personality? And if so, how do we manage it?

When I was in the wine industry, I discovered that drinking was a key that unlocked the playful, liberated and carefree side of me. But since becoming a virtual teetotaller, I found that part of me didn't get out to play much, and consequently I had become rather miserable.

What I'm learning is that yes, it is normal to have two distinct sides to our personalities (perhaps even more). Managing it is simply allowing it to be.

The less we suppress ourselves, the less our need to 'let our hair down' and the less extreme these personality traits are. The key to inner tranquility is to express all facets of our personality, without mood enhancers. It's the bringing together of both sides that gives us balance and a healthy spirit.

Perhaps our focus on being 'adults' has made us forget what it is like to truly have fun and play - and the only thing outrageous is, exactly that.

Until tomorrow, may you celebrate the Gemini within.

Grace xx